Nine Things To Keep Love Alive
Falling in love can feel so easy, the Honeymoon period is such a dream and then comes the part after. The part where roots are put down and you get down to the harder part of the relationship, the time when decisions are made, where you may move into together, decide to get married or start a family or travel but it if generally the part where you start to see more of who a person is and how they decide or do things in everyday life.
It's also the part where you can start to fall into a rut as you find your rhythm as a couple and start to fit your everyday lives together. Which is such a fun time in itself but can become monotonous as you fall into a groove or stop trying as much as you used to and sometimes love can fade as each of you don't do those little things to show that you're thinking of them or do anything special anymore. Which can lead the relationship to getting boring or upsetting as neither of you feel appreciated and loved and it spirals down.
This is the part where you need to work at keeping the love alive and here are some ideas...
- Pencil in a Date NightOne day a week, get dressed and get out of the house and go somewhere. Anywhere. Go for a walk, a movie, dinner just do something because dating someone shouldn't stop just because you said I do or moved in together.
- Do not Text every five minutes when you are not near each other.
If you are at work or whatever be there, talk to work friends but unless you are reminding your partner to pick up milk or an emergency or double checking a date there is no reason to text or call. When you are away from each other you are doing something, something you can later talk about when you actually see eah other. If you just text all day then when you are together you have nothing to say and I bet one of you is getting upset that you're not talking? - Do something Small
Write a post it and hide it in their lunch/bag. Send them an email. Buy their favourite magazine. A ten second little thing that doesn't take much out of your day but shows you are thinking of them and know them. - Flirt.
Seriously. Come hither eyes, sexting, cheeky winks. Keep doing it. Don't let it die off. - Put in effort with Appearance.
By this I mean if you started off your relationship dressing up for dates don't just stop because you're in a relationship because it possibly means you weren't being the real if the real you never makes an effort when you go out. This does not mean you have to go to the nines all the time but you can wear nice clothes more than to just important functions. Or even with everyday clothes, for example wear jeans and a shirt but make sure their clean, ironed, do your hair maybe a bit of make up if you like just put some effort into it and expect the other to as well because your both worth someone trying for you. It's all about the effort, it shows the other person you still care enough to try. (I really hope this makes sense without it sounding like appearances are everything, their not! it's just the effort behind it) - Don't go to bed angry
For the love of Romeo and Juliet don't go to bed angry. If you fight, then fight but sit down and talk and do not say everything is fine if you are still upset. Nothing kills love than a festering wound of anger. You both need to be able to talk and work through things. You come out stringer at the end and it also shows you're both willing to fight for your relationship - Sex
Do I really need to explain this one? You should enjoy this with your partner and if it has slumped a bit is it because someone possibly can't be bothered? If so a little effort on both sides helps (and no it doesn't mean you have to do it every time the other asks for it, just don't let it die off or give up on it, keep doing it. Literally) - Find a common Obsession
I know one couple who were obsessed with the Walking Dead, My husband and I play Pokemon Go together, I know people who love going to Cross-fit and doing comps together. It can take time but look for something you both just love and can do together, something you talk about and react over and jump up and down over then share it. - Give up on Perfection
Seriously, it doesn't exist. There is no such thing as a perfect relationship so no point putting that pressure on yourself and them, it is one of the sure fire ways to kill a relationship because if you want perfection, everything that isn't "perfect" is going to chip away at what you have instead of you enjoying what you do have.
It essentially comes down to putting in effort. It's always easy at the start, everything is new and shiny and pretty. But keeping it alive is work, for some it's more than others but it still takes effort. Asking anyone with a marriage spanning decades who are still in love and they will tell you hell I will tell you. Husband and I work at it everyday and try everyday. It's harder some days than others but we're still going strong because of it.
Would love to hear some tips from you guys? What do you do to keep love alive?
Talk to you lovers later,
Eros
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